Loss of identity

When you grow up in an environment where your emotional needs were not met, or where your uniqueness and boundaries were dismissed or ignored, it can leave you feeling unsure of who you really are. Many adults who have experienced childhood trauma tell me that they feel lost, like they are not quite sure where they end and everyone else begins. This is because you were never given the space to safely explore who you are.

Instead of learning to trust your feelings, your choices, or your inner voice, you may have learned to stay quiet, to please others, or to be what others needed you to be. That natural process of becoming your own person was disrupted. You might now find it hard to make decisions, to identify your values, or to know what actually matters to you. You might feel disconnected from your emotions, unsure of your purpose, or like your life does not really reflect who you are deep down.

This is something I see often in my work with clients. When your focus during childhood was simply getting through each day, there was no room for self-exploration. You might have taken on careers, roles, or relationships that felt expected or safe, not because they truly reflected your interests or strengths. And now, even when things look fine on the outside, something inside still feels missing or off.